Last week I was sick with what I thought was a normal cold. I was very tired for a couple of days, but the congestion never got really bad and I felt better over the weekend. As other symptoms subsided, I realized I had a sore throat that wasn't going away. Wednesday I had a strep test that was negative. Yesterday evening it was quite bad, and today it seems a bit better.
This has given me an opportunity to see how I experience, and deal with, chronic pain. I don't like it. I just want it to go away. It diminishes my ability to concentrate on other things. Each night I go to sleep with the hope that it will be better in the morning - and then wake up in the early hours with it screaming at me louder than over.
It hurts the most when I swallow, and so my mind wants to avoid doing things that require swallowing. I'm sitting here with a cup of tea, aware that every sip I take will activate the discomfort. I sip anyway. Perhaps I'll get used to it.
I do have confidence that it's a temporary state, and at some point in the near future I will feel better. I don't know how I would deal with it if I thought it would persist indefinitely, or get progressively worse. Perhaps you can't know that unless you experience it. There are things I'd prefer not to know.
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