In Due Time

I was reminded twice today of the need to be patient, to let things develop, and emerge when they are ready.

Since deciding to compose a piece for two saxophones for a concert coming up on April 27, I have been struggling to capture good ideas and develop them into a finished piece.  Continually falling behind where I think I should be in the process, I look at the calendar and wonder if I will possibly complete it in time.

I came back from Puerto Rico with another idea in my head, and have worked it over for the past couple of days, playing it on the piano, writing pieces down, leaving it, then coming back to revisit it.  This evening I entered a good bit of music into my compositional software and feel that I've made another big step in reentering the composing process after a year away.  There's no point in trying to force it out - it will come when it's ready.  I need to spend my energy on the activities - like regular playing - that allow the ideas to ferment.

Another struggle was scheduling a trip to Oklahoma to see Dad, and Evan's family.  I began thinking about this right after Christmas, and thought I would go in March.  March approached, and the calendar filled up, so I picked a week in April.  But today, as I searched online for a ticket, I wasn't happy with the pricing, and felt the pressure of a busy April schedule as well - with income tax filing due and the upcoming concert.  So I looked ahead, and found an open week near the end of May.  Ticket prices and flight options were better, and the trip won't add any pressure to any other commitments.

When things aren't working, it's worth considering giving up on the expectation and stepping back for a fresh start.  There's a time for everything, and it's better to go with that flow than to force what isn't quite ready yet.